Oh my wife and I went on an ocean cruise
Three days out and I was sick down to my shoes
And to make it more forlorn we sailed into a raging storm
Where we were nobody seemed to have a clue

While the ship was being tossed and thrown about
I decided that I'd try to take a nap
Then I heard an awful noise and I asked one of the boys
What had happened and you should of heard him shout

Where were you when the ship hit the sand
I said I was in there praying for dry land
With a bucket and my breakfast in my hand
Where were you when the ship hit the sand

Oh the captain he came a running up on deck
He was a looking kinda pale around the neck
As he stood there shouting orders I stood splashing in the water
And I ask exactly what you might expect